Longing
by Endestprana
Summary: A simple hope in the form of a bright light that destroys malice around...


" _ **Waiting is the most awarding…"**_

No use. No use at all. Nothing worked. She tried it all. From trying to bring the girl to the place they both held dear to slapping the girl's face. There's no response whatsoever. Those eyes kept on staring blankly at her. That gaze… It killed Chika slowly but sure. After all of her hopeless struggles, she got nothing. The only thing that changed after all this whole year was those eyes. They stared at Chika… Yes, staring lifelessly as if it told her to lose hope and stop trying. But how could she did that? There's no way she would do that.

Chika's tears were falling almost endlessly all this year. She couldn't hold it whenever she saw her friend on that bed. So defenseless and expressionless. Nothing like the one she knew. The one who might be having infinite energy in doing everything. The one whose smile matched hers. The one who always saved her whenever Chika's in trouble. Chika's eyes must be fooling herself. Yes, at least that's what she'd been saying to herself all this time. All this time while she waited and waited without any sign of improvement. The opened eyes? What Chika wanted wasn't a powerless doll. She wanted her friend back. She wanted You-chan.

The diary that You-chan's mother gave to her when she visited the hospital for the first time after her friend fell unconscious that day gave her the shock that she needed. The shock she needed so she could see the situation more attentively. If only she convinced herself to stop Aqours. At least, if only she's fast enough to recruit the others so You-chan didn't have to help her that time. Then maybe, maybe this wouldn't have to happen.

But You-chan was the first person she wanted to be with when she saw that shining group in Tokyo. There's just no way she wouldn't invite her friend into things that would make both of them struggle together. Well, that is if her friend was still the strong one she knew. If only Chika realized the illness that struck her friend beforehand then maybe she would've choose another option. And of course she knew that doing all this self-blaming wouldn't get her anywhere. More like she only tortured herself repeatedly. A way to atone for her greatest mistake? No way that's true.

She knew You-chan would've still helped her even if she didn't ask for it. She'd just know when Chika needed help. That's the kind of friend You-chan is for her. **"I'm happiest when I'm with you, Chika-chan…!"** The sentence that You-chan sometimes said to her when they were alone. It was so dazzling that Chika never realized the weight of those words were far from what she could handle. In her friend's words, the feeling that backed it up was produced from a will to always prioritized Chika in any situations, no matter what might happen to You-chan herself she would keep on helping her friend. It was something Chika couldn't afford to do. The reason was simple. Is there even a need to help an almighty girl like You-chan? No way, right? "Yeah, Chika-chan, say that again to yourself! Say that again after all of your carelessness that have cost your friend's life! You said you're her best friend yet you couldn't even spot her struggle against her illness. What kind of friend are you?! Are you sure you're her best friend? Don't you think you're mistaken it for your best tool?" self-loathing Chika as she cried because of her own cruel words.

That night passed without anything significant. At least not for Chika. What? Christmas's Eve? Why would she care about such thing? Nowadays, all happy things didn't really mean a thing to her. At least it will stayed that way until she managed to wake her friend up. As the clock ticking slowly, the energy inside Chika was slowly drained. All the crying must be killing her body and mind. And so, she fell right beside her friend on the bed.

A gleam of light shone through the tunnel as Chika regained consciousness. Where is she? At least she knew that she's not in real world. Well, it might a dream world. But it must be surprising, because all dreams she had nowadays were all the moments she didn't managed to save her friend and thus making her friend condemned her. As Chika tried to think positively, she ran chasing the gleaming light. She ran as fast as she could while her mind was filled with nothing but hope of meeting her friend there. And after all those running she did, she arrived at a place that seemed to be an altar. What for? She didn't know. More like she didn't care. What's important was not the altar but the silver-haired girl who's standing in the middle of it. There's no one with those blue eyes and those silky skin, complete with those beautiful-looking lips other than her friend. Her best friend. You-chan. Watanabe You.

"You-chan…" Chika started to cry

"Hey, Chika-chan… Long time no see… Are you doing fine?" asked You-chan to her crying friend who refused to look at her as she wiped the tears on her face

"Are you doing fine?" said Chika as she tried to hold the anger that suddenly built up inside of her "Aren't you supposed to say something to me first? My condition is not something important right now!" Chika tried to not let herself screamed

"Well, I know… But you looked so sad like that so I just thought you were feeling bad or something…. Hehe…" You-chan tried to brightened her friend but Chika still refused to look her way "Sorry…" ended You-chan

" _Sorry…? I looked sad…? Ha… haha… hahahaha…. Hahahahaahahahhaha….! OF COURSE I LOOKED SAD, YOU STUPID! You've been unconscious for a whole year, leaving me without even giving me a chance to help you! You'd think I will look happy after what you did to me!? I cried a lot and couldn't even stopped all of those self-loathing because I felt that I'd failed you since I didn't managed to help you! And here you were giving me an apology and asked me do I looked sad…? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA"_ Chika laughed while her tears kept on falling down on her wet cheeks _"Why, You-chan? Why you didn't answer me when I called out to you every day? Why are you keep on sleeping even though I was in so much sadness up there? Why? Is it that you finally got tired of me and so you wanted to leave me alone? Does being with me make you so unhappy and thus making me sad was a payback from you? Is that the case here, You-chan?! IS THAT IT, YOU-CHAN!?"_ the anger inside her kept on increasing as Chika let out her frustration, too _**"Hey, You-chan… are you not the happiest anymore with me?"**_ and thus the words that pierced through You-chan's heart, finally they crushed her last defense and so her tears also fell like Chika.

"I'm sorry, Chika-chan… I'm so sorry, Chika-chan… I was so afraid of going back to you… I'm afraid you will not accept me again because I failed to fulfill your dream together. I was afraid you might condemn me because I didn't live up to your expectation, Chika-chan… I'm sorry… I'm so sorry, Chika-chan… I never thought things would turned out this way…" You-chan let out her reason behind her failing to wake up all this time. It was You-chan herself who refused to wake up, deliberately avoiding being scorned by Chika if she did woke up

"I don't need your sorry! Why did you think of me that way, You-chan? Do I look like someone who prioritized her dream rather than her friend? Do I look like that to you?" Chika tried to be calm

"No…" You-chan also started to stopped crying

"You-chan…" Chika called out to her friend as she approached her slowly with her smile on her face "I always considered you as my special best friend. You're more precious than every other friend I had, you know? You're so special… really really special that it makes me brave enough to tell you everything about me. You are so special to me... so much that I was beyond happy when you said you were the happiest with me… When you said that, I thought you were treating me likewise… I thought I was also a special existence to you…" Chika hugged her friend "Am I really special to you, You-chan…? Are you really happy when you're with me?" Chika hugged her tighter

"O-Of course, Chika-chan! I never lied to you! I always regarded you as my special best friend, too. I love you so much I don't mind dying if it's for you! I always felt the happiest when I'm with you, Chika-chan! I really do…" answered You-chan

"Really?" softly asked Chika

"Of course…" likewise answered by You-chan

"Then, would you mind waking up for me…? Don't you think you're leaving me too long?" Chika said the words while sounded so cute You-chan couldn't help but hugged her friend tighter

"Of course not, Chika-chan… If you really wanted me to be with you again, then I will come to you again. I promise, Chika-chan…! I promise I will wake up and be by your side again, Chika-chan" now with conviction

"Then…, let's wake up together so we could enjoy the Christmas you've been looking forward to ever since last year…!" Chika drew herself from You-chan and then she looked directly at her friend's eyes

"Ch-Chika-chan…, how did you know about that?" You-chan was surprised

"Hehe… it's your fault for sleeping too long and left your diary out in the open, You-chan!" laughed Chika

"W-What? So cruel, Chika-chan… I never read yours, you know?" she started to cry again (Well, she didn't. She was just pouting)

"Well, I will let you read mine whenever you wanted, You-chan! Rather than that, let's go! It's already Christmas's Eve. We're not going to make it if we spend our times any longer here!" said Chika as she held her friend's hands

"Okay, then… Let's go back!" said You-chan and Chika nodded to her

So both of them closed their eyes together. Inside their hearts, they wished strongly so they would be awaken again, now together without being separated again. They wished and wished. They wished as if their lives depend on it. And then, after their continuous wishes, a white light shone throughout the room and it gave them a shock, so much that they opened their eyes, feeling surprised.

Chika woke up from her dream. She tried to collect her energy slowly, deep inside she still wished her dream came true and so she would see her friend now waking up for sure. Not just as a lifeless human like before, but as her special best friend whom she would spend her life forever with. And as if the Gods answered to her pure wish (and maybe her and You-chan's wishes), she felt a warmth, a warmth that she longed for all this time, holding up to her right hand. It was a familiar hand. Hand of someone she holds very dear in her heart. Feeling really happy, Chika raised up her head and then she found her friend, now finally looked at her together with her dazzling smile, holding her hand happily and then opened up her arms, wordlessly told Chika to confirm it by herself that she's finally back. She's finally together again after all this time.

It was 23 o'clock in the night of December the 24th. The snows fall but they didn't stroke their coldness into Chika as if they were also happy that You-chan was finally back into this world. Well, for Chika, tonight was the night she felt that miracle really did exist and so she would always remember this certain hour before Christmas as a gift directly from the Gods for all the waiting she'd been through.

" **At last we're complete again, right You-chan?"**


End file.
